Just yesterday, I was dwelling on the emptiness I feel inside
I have never felt so empty as I did yesterday
I was faced with a complete void
So much so that I had no other choice but to acknowledge it
I did not feel the presence of God
It was as if I were staring into nothingness
And nothingness was within me
And nothingness surrounded me
And emptiness was my friend

I went on with my daily activity
I rode my bike
I bought groceries
I read a book
I watched TV
Totally oblivious of the change that was about to take place
This morning

Last night I had a dream
About a man, and a ram, and a youth
The man was going to kill the youth
As a sacrifice to God
The young man was obliging
No rejection, no putting up a fight
He knew it had to be done this way
He was willing to sacrifice
Himself to God
The man didn’t want to sacrifice his son
His only son
But unlike me, the empty vessel
The man had faith that God was a provider
And God did provide
For at the last minute, before the slaughter of the innocent
Provision was made

I woke up this morning realizing that
It is through the faith of Abraham
That we are the children of God
Then I realized that the bible is a book of faith
It was by faith that the children of Israel were saved
It is through faith that we believe that Jesus is the Son of God
It is through faith that Job held out in dire circumstances
It is through faith that the walls of Jericho fell
It is through faith that African slaves endured hardship
In a foreign land, and obtained freedom, and became citizens
In a place that was not their home

The bible is full of stories of faith
I spent too much time searching for facts
Developing timelines
Working out arguments
Theorizing the virgin birth,
Localizing Noahs flood
Making excuses for the condition of man
And a whole lot of other stuff too much to mention
When the simple people of this world go about their business
Believing in Christmas, a day that, since I’ve been able to
Think for myself, knew had nothing at all to do with
The birth of Christ, but it is on this day
That I believe God has spoken to me
In a dream
And God has shown me
That it is not about the facts
I don’t know them anyway
I can’t prove the existence of God
But I do understand now, and believe
That through faith
God exist
Within us, throughout us, and without us
And that it is through the faith of Abraham
That we are children of God,
Because we are the offspring of Him
That believed through faith, not blood
Not works, not books, nor facts or theories

An empty vessel is sometimes a good thing to be